Criticism vs.
Conviction
Criticism and conviction are very similar. They both can
hurt. They both can spur us to change. They both can hit us in the very deepest
part of our heart. But how do we tell the difference between the discouraging
blows to our identity and convicting challenges that build our lives? It seems
like there are all sort of voices in this world bombarding us with ideas,
compliments, and curses. How do we filter out the destructive noise so God’s
strong hand can lead us down the path of righteousness? In my life, I’ve
noticed that how I talk to myself, how I listen to others, and how I listen to
the Spirit determine whether I am walking in His light or wilting in the
darkness.
Self-Talk
Jesus is the light unto our feet, yet sometimes we take that
like and shine it on our flaws in despair. What do you think about yourself?
When you listen to your own self-talk, what do you hear? If you heard someone else talk about your mother like you talk to
yourself, would it make you want to punch them in the face? Don’t beleaguer
God’s children with lies, even if you are the child. Too often we allow
ourselves to think about ourselves as worthless when the Judge has deemed us
worthy. I’m too fat. Nobody likes me. I’m
not good enough. I’m stupid. I’m not as cool as him. I’m not as pretty as her. They
never invite me too hang out; I must not be worth it. He doesn’t treasure me, I
must not be very valuable. She doesn’t respect me, I must not be very honorable.
Most of the time, our demeaning self-talk goes unnoticed. Yet, what we think
determines who we are. That’s why Paul instructs us to fill our minds with
thoughts about “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right,
whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, anything excellent
or praiseworthy.” So please don’t fill yourself with whatever is discouraging,
whatever is false, whatever is filthy, whatever is tainted, whatever is
hateful, or anything disturbing or discouraging. Discouraging yourself is like dumping waste at the top of a river.
Everything that flows out of you will have a bad taste. Encouragement is our fuel,
so plug your heart and your mind into the One who is Encouragement.
Let ‘Em Talk
People like to talk about all sorts of things, including
you. Unfortunately, some people don’t always speak words of encouragement or
praise. Perhaps that is why James spends a whole chapter discussing why the
tongue is like a small fire that can set a whole forest ablaze. The tongue can
corrupt the whole body and set the whole course of one’s life on fire. The
flame from the tongues of fire around us can set our sunny disposition ablaze.
What’s interesting is that most criticism comes from
misunderstanding. I’ve seen it in myself: when I don’t understand something, I
criticize it. You better believe some people around you won’t understand some
of the things you do. Don’t expect them to.
On another note, criticism comes when you deviate from a plan
that someone has for your life. You have a will for your life. So does God. So
does Satan. And so do the people around you. When someone sees you do something
that is not part of their will for your life, they are going to talk. I can’t believe he’s dating her. I can’t
believe he does that. I can’t believe they don’t agree with this. I can’t
believe they didn’t take part in that. I can’t believe they said that. I saw
them do this; I bet you they are doing that. So
if all the people around us—even our closest friends and relatives—are going to
talk about us, how do we respond to this public relations nightmare?
Get a New PR Agent
Face it. No matter how hard you try, you’ll never get every
single person to like you. Trust me. So why don’t we give up our public
relations job to someone who is a little better at managing people: God. Make
God your PR Agent. Stop worrying about what people say. They are going to talk.
Your job is to act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with your God. To put it
simply, if pleasing people is your goal,
you cannot be Christ’s servant. That means stop trying to impress the
people around you. That means stop trying to leave a good impression on that
person you’re crushing on. That means stop worrying about being awkward around
non-Christians; just love them and let God’s light shine through you,
regardless of whether they bask in it or go hide in the darkness. That means
stop feeling bad about someone who disapproves of something they don’t
understand. That means less pontificating prayers, less crowd conscious
conversation, less people pleasing publicity, and less fretting about who wants
to be your friend. We’ve got to stop worrying about what others think of
us. God is our audience and the Cross is our acceptance. When we really believe that we are loved and
accepted, we no longer have to be the best, to compare ourselves to others, to
strive to make a good impression, to compete for attention, or to run around
looking for love in all the wrong places.
Conviction, not
Convicts
Why do you feel guilty? You are not a convict. There is no condemnation in Christ. If you
are in Christ you are a new creation: the old has gone and the new has come.
So please do not let yourself talk to yourself like that. Please don’t let
others’ opinion of you (and your perception of others’ opinion!) condemn you.
Because of Christ, you deserve better. Before you deserved all condemnation—your
stains were as red as the WKU Mascot—but now, you’ve been made pure and
innocent.
The father of lies hinders the hearts of the faithful by
implanting lies in the hearts of our minds. Satan knows that if he can get you
down on yourself, you’ll be less likely to offer life-giving encouragement to
others. If you’re consumed with your
flaws, how could you produce fruit in others? What’s more, Satan loves to
disguise discouragement as conviction from the spirit. You didn’t give enough money. You didn’t love them as well as you
should have. You’re a bad Christian for not reading the bible more. God’s mad
at you for missing church last Sunday. But God does not guilt his children
into action. Has that ever been the method of a good Father? No! God uses the
Spirit make conviction, not convicts.
Criticism vs.
Conviction
Criticism is gruesome. Conviction is beautiful. Criticism is
temporary. Conviction is long-lasting. Criticism is self-focused. Conviction is
God-focused. Criticism takes begrudgingly. Conviction gives joyfully. Criticism
stirs up strife. Conviction instills peace. Criticism is a jab to the heart.
Conviction is heart surgery. Criticism comes in crowds, hurry, and noise.
Conviction comes in intimacy, stillness, and quiet. Criticism is the angry mob,
itching to stone the condemned. Conviction is the soft savior, restoring the
condemned to go and sin no more. Criticism
is like a nail on the road, popping your tire and letting all the air out. Conviction
is like a guard rail, steering you back to God and keeping you from harm.
Criticism is loud and boisterous, shouting at you with spit flying and drool
dripping. Conviction is a soft whisper, quieting your soul and setting you by
still water. Criticism makes you feel like a golden retriever puppy in the
hands of a furious owner. Conviction makes you feel like a little kid leaving
the arms of a father as you glide down the street on your first bike ride. When
you reflect on criticism, it makes you argue with that imaginary foe in the
shower and justify yourself before the jury. When you reflect on conviction, it
gives you an urgency to glorify God and change things for the better. To put it
simply, criticism caves in and conviction constructs. The criticized,
criticize. The convicted, convict. Hurt people hurt people. Loved people love
people. Let God’s love wash away in criticism that has tainted your heart.
In my life, criticism affects me when I forget my identity
in Christ. If I put my trust in my own efforts and abilities, I am crushed when
someone criticizes my efforts and abilities. If I put my trust in my choices
and perfection, I am crushed when someone criticizes my choices and points out
my imperfection. But if I put my trust in Jesus, I will rejoice when someone
criticizes me, because they are not criticizing me, but instead, my Jesus. He took my punishment and he takes the
criticism. I am free to be nobody because Jesus was Somebody. I am free to be worth nothing because He is worth
everything. I gave Him my life, criticism included.
In my life, conviction comes when I am humble and contrite.
It comes through His word and His Spirit. It comes in the worship and the
praise. It comes in the conflict and the pain. It comes in loving friends and
wholesome fellowship. I can always tell when I am feeling the conviction of the
Spirit because everything is so clear and so peaceful. It’s like my mind shouts
eureka! But my heart rests in tranquility. In essence, I love conviction; its
leads to God; it leads to life. All that I have done wrong, Christ has
absorbed. Likewise, if there is anything I have done right, it is Christ in me,
not me. Therefore, I don’t let criticism
get to my heart and I don’t let praise get to my head.
So dear blog readers, be convicted to seek conviction. It is
for freedom that Christ set us free. If you live for the affection of others,
you will die by the criticisms of others. But if you live to please your Father
in Heaven, you can crucify all those criticisms on the cross, and let Christ’s
sweet conviction move you into the Father’s presence.
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